How To Tell Your Best Friend You Have Feelings For Them

How To Tell Your Best Friend You Have Feelings For Them

It can be scary and nerve-wracking to tell a friend that you have developed feelings for them, beyond your friendship. You may fear being rejected, or fear that the friendship will be ruined if you tell your friends your true feelings. How do you start the conversation? What should you say? These are all questions you may be asking yourself, but it is important that you be honest with your friend about how you feel. Here are some tips on how you can approach your friend and reveal your honest feelings towards them.

Determine your motives

Why do you want to pursue a romantic relationship with your friend? This is a question you should be asking yourself. Determine your motive for wanting to bring your feelings up to them. Do you see a future with your friend, or are you just looking for something casual? Become clear about your intentions so that you can effectively communicate them to your friend when the time is right.

Assess the situation

How close are you and your friend? Have they given you signs that they have romantic feelings for you, or will this come as a complete surprise to them? Assessing the friendship between you two can give you a good idea of how they may react to your news. Consider their feelings before you approach them with the news. 

Choose the right time and place 

When deciding that you want to tell your friend that you have feelings for them, the timing is everything. The right time and the right place can be a huge difference in how your friend is going to react. Try not to tell them when they are distracted or busy. Instead, try to communicate your feelings when you both are alone in a place where nothing or no one can interrupt you. Try meeting at a park or one of your houses. 

Be clear and direct 

When you express yourself to your friend, try to be as clear and direct as you can with them. Avoid being too vague or beating around the bush. Once you say that you have feelings for them, also be clear about what you would like from the relationship instead of making them guess. Whether you want to pursue a romantic relationship, or pursue something a little less serious, make sure you communicate that to them. Communicating effectively gives your friend the best chance to respond to everything you have shared with them. 

Be prepared for any reaction

Your friend is allowed to have any reaction they have after you share your feelings with them. They may be surprised or confused. Whether your friend is excited and okay with what you have said, or rejects you and doesn't want to pursue something beyond a friendship, you want to be prepared for both. Sometimes, they might not say anything because they need some time to process what you have just told them. It's important that you are respectful and patient to your friend and give them the time and space they need to be able to respond to you. 

Listen to their response

As this is your friend and you care about them, be sure to respectfully listen to their response to what you have shared with them. Don't be closed off to what they have to say, even if it isn't necessarily what you wanted to hear. Having an open conversation where you both can express your feelings, thoughts, and concerns is the best way to handle this situation. 

Respect their decision

There is a chance that your friend may not feel the same way about you as you do about them, and that is okay. If this is the case, you need to respect their decision. At the end of the day, you all are friends and just because you have been rejected does not mean it has to be the end of the friendship. You both can continue to be friends and respect each other's friendship. 

It can be hard to tell whether you should tell your friend if you have feelings for them for fear that you may lose your friendship. You care about this person and you don't want to make anyone uncomfortable or nervous after sharing your feelings. By using all of the tips mentioned above, you can ensure that when you reveal your feelings toward your friend, you are doing so with honesty and integrity.