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My Wife Breastfeeds Our Son In Public Without Covering Herself. I Feel Embarassed By This. How Can I Have Her Change Her Behavior?
Can I Have Her Change Her Behavior?
For breastfeeding advocates, breastfeeding moms, and even lactation consultants, this
question might not be received well. Nursing a baby through a woman's body is not a modern
invention of humanity. It dates back to the dawn of time. From 6 million years ago ( homo
sapiens evolution) to this day. Despite how long it has been present, the controversies
surrounding breastfeeding are still around.
In the US, the over-sexualization of women's breasts contributed to the stigma surrounding
breastfeeding. A survey conducted by a private group says that breastfeeding in public makes
others feel uncomfortable and view it as inappropriate. Thankfully, not everyone has the same
views regarding this matter.
Breastfeeding moms have the right to nurture their babies through breastfeeding either in a
private or public setting. It is even illegal for anyone to shame mothers who do this in public.
It is forbidden to even ask them to leave the premises when they are nursing.
In 2018, breastfeeding in public is made legal in all 50 states. In the following year, all
employers should provide clean and safe lactation accommodations as well as ample amounts of
time to express milk for the breastfeeding moms that are close to their workstations. It is
projected that in the year 2030, all breastfeeding moms will not only have access to lactation
accommodation at work but also will have paid family leave and universal childcare.
The overwhelming support to the women who push to nurture their babies through their
bodies is commendable. Even the legislators view it as essential for the healthy growth of 'little
humans' who are the next generations who will run the future of the world.
As more and more become open to breastfeeding in public, the time will surely come when it
will become natural, almost second to breathing, to see a woman nursing a baby everywhere.
However, there is still a small percentage who don't support this. Most are husbands who have
wives nursing their babies in public.
Instead of directly telling your wife that you feel embarrassed about her nursing in public (and
risk endless arguments right after), you should begin to suggest some ways she can nurse
without making you disconcerted in the process.
1. Buy her some nursing-friendly dresses, clothes, tops, and bras for easy access to breasts
during feeding and when expressing milk without lifting the shirts off and end up exposing
more skin (like the tummy).
2. Scout some safe place for your woman to nurse in comfort and away from the judging eyes
of the public.
3. Invest in baby slings or baby wraps because it will be easier to breastfeed using those. Aside
from its offer of a little discretion, a close contact between mother and baby, it gives freedom
for your wife's hands to eat while you are in the restaurant or out in public in general.
4. When nursing in public is inevitable like you are at the airport with a delayed flight, all the
expressed milk in bottles has been consumed and your baby is 'hangry' (angry and hungry),
consider providing a cloth to cover her up to her chest where the baby is feeding.
5. Lastly, make her understand your intention why you want her to cover herself up while
nursing your baby. If you want to be blatant about it, go ahead. But know that a mother with a
child is quite sensitive (actually as a husband, this is the first thing you should notice). Be careful
wording out your reasons as this will determine if she will be happy seeing you for the next two
In conclusion, breastfeeding a baby doesn't incite indecency nor suggest any immorality. The
milk of the mothers not only offers satisfaction to the baby but also gives nutrients that boost
immunity. Many have even attempted to replicate its composition but none has ever come
close to it and the benefits it can give to infants. So, a mother only needs a strong support
system to succeed in her breastfeeding journey. Instead of being her critics, be her advocate.