What does it mean to be a responsible and independent adult? I want to be one!

Words like emotionally mature, financially wise, being all grown up, fully developed in mind, etc. are often used in connection with adulthood. But sometimes, it is hard for us to come to an agreement on what an adult really is. Is it our age that makes us an adult, or is it a collection of characteristics that make us one? 

Well, I would like to say that the characteristics of being responsible and independent are two of the most important traits of adults. 

Benefits to becoming  a responsible and independent adult

How we emphasize the importance of independence impacts how we respond to accepting help from our support group, to our mental health and to our physical health. In addition, building a responsible character as an adult increases our self-confidence and self-esteem. We feel skilled to handle different life situations. Being both independent and responsible also reduces stress and increases feelings of happiness. 

What is responsibility? 

Being a responsible adult means taking the blame or the credit for your success, failures, and achievements. It means taking full ownership of your decisions, and their consequences, and not passing blame to others. Responsible individuals are reliable in their personal and interpersonal relationships. 

Self-responsibility leads to increased goal-oriented actions, improved mental wellbeing, and proactive decision-making and problem-solving. 

What is independence? 

Human development theories state that adulthood is marked with changes in lifestyle and relationships. Young adults are now leaving home, seeking long-term romantic relationships, building a career and establishing their own families. These important life events require a sense of independence. 

Being an independent adult is linked to greater financial accountability and success, and career development.

How do I become a more responsible and independent adult? 

• Know yourself and reflect. 

Part of adulthood is experiencing complex situations, and when we don’t know how to deal with them, we tend to point fingers and blame other people or circumstances for our problems, reactions or results. 

Being emotionally responsible means being able to know our own contribution to the situation, our own strengths, weaknesses and triggers, and our needs and expectations and goals. 

We also learn to show up and live in the moment, apply our skills, and later reflect on and learn more about ourselves in different situations. We know what we bring to the table, and become more understanding of others as well. 

• Learn to take the wheel. You’ll get better at it. 

Assuming the full responsibility for your life including your thoughts, emotions and actions is an empowering move. There are so many decisions to make in adult life that we can either relinquish the decision-making to another person because we feel inadequate or are scared of consequences or we learn to get better at it through practice. Being indecisive can push us back from things that fulfill our needs and dreams. 

When you decide for yourself, you’ll want to spend more time and effort in pursuing our own goals in our professional, financial, relationship and personal lives. For example, when we envision a healthy romantic relationship with our spouse, we don’t give them the responsibility to figure out our own needs and expect them to fulfill them all, but we learn to communicate our needs clearly and lovingly and agree with each other in meeting both our needs in the relationship. 

• Commit to your growth. 

Now that you know yourself and you have decided to take the wheel of control for your life, it is time to dedicate yourself to your personal growth or improvement. You can do this by setting personal goals, using resources to help you reach them, and building loving relationships while you are in your journey to becoming a more responsible and independent adult. Go for training, workshops, communities or mentoring that can help you achieve your aims.

Becoming the best version of your adult self requires dedication to be more responsible and independent. Putting yourself on the road towards that maturity will be so worth it!

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